Today, I wanted to have my first sit-down conversation about the friends we have and ways to keep our friendships healthy. I've had a variety of friends and all of our experiences have not been the best but because of our attempt to remain friends, I have gathered a few tips to help keep you and your group of friends happy as you grow together. Here are 3 tips to help you maintain your mental health as well as a happy friend group.
1. Allow Everyone Their Alone Time.
Everyone in the world needs their alone time and that is equally as important for those you consider important in your life like friends. As I've grown up, I've realized how important my alone time was. It gave me time with my self to reflect on things that may be a part of my journey as I've grown. It's also given me an opportunity to reset myself in order for others to appreciate my presence. My friend group has spent a lot of time with each other in the last 10-15 years and I'd say that when people started to break away and live in their own brains for a little while it really started to affect us as a group. It wasn't until we started to evaluate our reasoning behind the alone time that it became normal for us to do and even appreciate. When giving others their alone time it allows them to focus on themselves a bit in order to understand that they need to make themselves happy and in order to keep those around them committed to the friendship.
2. Be Present, ALWAYS!
In a friend group we are all going through our daily troubles but it's something about those friends who are committed to being a pillar of love even in the hardest times. If you've learned your friends then you've probably also learned what it takes to keep them smiling. Normally this is done when they are around you or they are at least present in your life. Avoiding those who you consider to be important to you allows the cancer of unsureness to ease into the friend group and if your communication is not on point then your brain will go wild trying to understand why someone is no longer active in your life. I've also learned that for your presence to be appreciated, it must go both ways. Everyone who is a part of the relationship should be active enough to contribute equally to the relationship. If one is slacking then the other feels that their contribution to the relationship is not that important even if the feeling is a bit different. So take the time to be present in your friend group and contribute equally.
3. Communicate Till The Wheels Fall Off!
Communication is one element that is important for any relationship to be successful. You have friends who are introverted and you have those friends who are a bit extroverted. Understanding these personality traits helps you understand how to communicate to others and at times gives you an idea of your approach to their communication habits. When communicating make sure that you're exercising active listening, pause enough to allow the other person to speak, give your undivided attention to the person who has the floor. I haven't perfected the communication thing with my friend group just yet but I've allowed myself to be open to communicating a bit more than I used to in the past. I'm naturally an introverted person so it takes me a bit longer to open up for communication. I will say that because I do have friends who are a bit more opposite then me, I've been a bit more open to being spontaneous and communicating a bit more. I will say that I should do better with initiating conversation. I've learned that we are all so busy with our everyday lives that initiating conversation is a bit more harder than just engaging in one. The love that I have for those around me makes the effort worth it.
This is just my 2 cents on how to keep your sanity along with a happy friend group. No one says that it will be perfect but the least we can do is try.
Happy Thursday!
- Carter